Novelist

Was taking the bus home ytd when i saw a guy wearing a shirt with a beri meaningful logo. It wrote ' To Err Is Human, To Forgive Is Divine.'. The phrase sets me thinking and i realised just how true it was. To forgive, its something everybody have done before, but can all things be forgiven? Then ironically i chanced upon another phrase on the internet, ' Women Forgives But Never Forgets, Men Forgets But Never Forgives.'. Linking the 2 phrases together leads us to a single conclusion--> Women are divine and since forgetting is a type of erring, men are human.... LOLX.

Alrite enough with word play. Seriously speaking, forgiving someone realli takes alot of effort. Hating is not as taxing as forgiving somebody although some ppl beg to differ. I am a human, i do hate ppl also. Most notably the first person on my hitlist is a secondary school guy called Domanic, he is public enemy number one during sec school days. lolx. He spouts nonsense to insult ppl, super tactless, likes to comment on strangers in public aloud, burps super loudly after eating food PURPOSELY and thinks he's realli goodlooking and gals will die under his hands. Has a huge ego and is super childish mentally. Even up till now, some of my sec frens tat were in contact with him also commented that he is still the same as before. I saw the death note 2 premiere yesterday midnite and IF i have the death note, i will write his name down. Yes, my hatred was that deep. So u see, i was telling myself to forgive him, yet i cannot do it, i dun understand y. Am i still immature to cling on to something so ancient?

Talking about death note, i believe people mostly will have personal use for the note provided they have it. Ask yourself, do u have someone's name that u wanna write? Sincerely ask urself, no matter ur answer is yes or no, both of these answers hint abit about ur mental state. For myself, im a honest person, so i do have names to write. :) Or maybe just one name ba, the domanic lor. lolx.

Okays, the above is just a thought after i watched the movie. Its not bad, those planning to watch it most prob will get their money's worth. ^_-

Was chatting with my sec skool buddy fadhir ( yes, he is malay, ironically. lolx) on msn tat nite when he reignited my flair for novel writing. We were toking about eragon u see, and i suddenly remembered that i wrote a novel when i was 14 yrs old and fadhir was the onli person that kws about it. hahass. Then i went rummaging thru my files and folders from primary school days ( the paper type, not the software files.. -.-) and voila, i found it! Wow, it realli amazes me how imaginative i was even though i was so young. The novel is titled Dragon's Eye and it recounts the tale of young boy ( yeah i kw, its a boy again.. zzz) who was the sole survivor of a Dragon Clan. The novel is quite complete with a HUGE world, evil villians, and the most interesting part was, i created and sketched 24 legendary weapons each complete with its veri own explanations and magicks. There's swords, spears, maces, bows etc.. hahasss

And yes, i most probably will do a reediting of the novel and maybe upgrade the language abit more to substantiate for a more mature crowd. So yes, im writing a fantasy novel beri soon, and i shall try to insert some more characters and expand the 'vision' of the world. Wars and battles of large scales are a staple and finally finish things up with a touch of extreme creativity. :)
All the above will definitely take some time, because im starting school soon in 3 weeks time. Studies are more important, so most prob will study HARDER nxt sem. Faram( final fantasy prayer.)

Yesterday went for my company's chalet at downtown east. Met up with weikoon and a few others at bugis first to buy present to exchange at the chalet. Reached chalet at 6+ i tink, lolx.
Saw lots of people there, most of them i kw, but some of the 'finer' ones i dun kw. LOLX. When i say finer ones, i guess my close frens kw wat i meant hor peter? sean? kuku? hahass. :P
Well, seeing and admiring is not sinning mah, anyways i still have 46 days of 'sentence' to serve before i can officially start all over again leh. hahass :)

The finest of them all was ironically corinne's sec school fren. lolx, i was sitting with corinne and suddenly this beri beri pretty gal came and looked for corinne. I think she's called theresa or sumthing lah, she came with her bf ivan ( which is boss's younger brother.. -.-"). Number 2 and 3 were in a group of 3 gals. They came with boss and i tink their names are rachel and mandy if my memory doesnt fails me. lolx. Not too bad lor, got gals to see, food to eat and frens to tok. wootz. Then went to play blackjack with boss and i won around $8 then have to zao le. sad lors, can win more de, but i alreadi steady with ah wei to watch death note at 1120pm at jurong point mah. kaoz. In the end im still late. fark. zzzz

The nite b4 i went to meet the guys from army days for some drinks and chat. Everyone looks the same, even uncle sam our senior medic also looks the same leh. hahass. Dev i tink grew fatter maybe due to eating too much australian food. LOLx. I met vincent, who is coincidentally a veri close fren of one of my OG frens. Small world sia, hahass. Anyways vin is a nice guy and he is damn steady, so most prob will join our little Armour Medics Gang. hahass :P

Okays, enough crapping le. Im beri tired todae, i OVERHAULED my room todae sia. Knn whole day at home clean up, damn tiring. Tomolo got people come paint my house, wootz!


Jason's Famous Quotes: Character is more enduring then looks.

Did You Know?: Guardian pharmacy is called Mannings pharmacy in Hong Kong!

Rain

Didnt blog for a few days cause i was well --> lazy. Watched DEJA VU with ah wei and his fren jingying. The movie was not bad, abit technical but still can understand the time and space folding concept. Makes me think about if there is a possibility of going back to the past and prevent or change something from happening, where would i be now? Alot of things wouldnt be the way that they are now, a stalemate which seems to be endlessly hopeless.

im sporting a new hairdo now, beri beri short no thanks to my stewpid encik during reservist.
A encik is a term we soldiers call out RSM ( regimental sergeant major) for those that dun kw. He damn garang lor, made me cut my hair so short. zzzz... Anyways reservist was a breeze because we kinda slept thruout the entire affair. U see, my unit's training was in june and i deferred that, hence i had to be attached to another sister unit for makeup training. Around 8 guys were with me and we were the 'outcasts' or 'invisibles'. lolx. Nominal roles for the training didnt have our names and hence we cant join the training and ippt. Wow, i went back and realli became a caveman---> Eat, Shit, Sleep, Play Cards (and the cycle repeats itself...) . Although some ppl tinks that its so good to be so idle, i beg to differ. Extreme nua-ness leads to super low physical metabolism and that means fat and useless. zzzz

Got to kw 8 new frens during tis ICT and as usaul, all seems fine initially. During the last day, some ppl (2 in particular) displayed 'patterns' and im juz standing aside and seeing how things unfold. Imagine asking a favour from someone and u get shown the black face, how would u feel? An old saying 'a frend in need is a frend indeed' realli hits the spot. Watever sia, fuck them, we onli meet once a yr for maybe 2wks max, so who the heck cares wat kind of fucks they are? :)

The day b4 went for primary school gathering (I know, im super busy these days. lolx) at cineleisure KBOX with buffet. wootz. The buffet was not super impressive, but at least some food were still edible, there were even oysters though i dun realli like oysters. :p The guys and gals from xingnan primary are still fit and healthy, a few guys got hitched up and brought their gfs along to intro to us. hahass. Its quite surprising that after like 11 yrs, we still meet up, i feel blessed to have them as frens because who the hell meets their primary schools frens nowadays? hahasss :)

Lots of appointments nowadays, going to meet the army dudes on thursday nite for drinks and chat. Then most prob around christmas having a sec school gathering. wootz, im meeting all my school frens within this mth sia. hahass. Looking back, my life isnt tat bad after all, seeing all the ppl that walked most of my life with me again made me realigned myself with my world. I see the world in yet another different aspect again. hahass.. :p

Adel went back to work at starhub le, i sort of wanna go back, but if i go back, its because of her or because i need a job? Going back for her is dumb, going back for a job is the correct attitude. In the past i screwed my job because of her, i keep getting preoccupied with her and well, i realli screwed my job. lolx. Jerjer is working at SH now and he was calling me to go back to work there when we were chatting at KFC the other day. Should i or should i not? Or can i?

When someone tells u ' i dun read ur blog' , what does it shows? It means that person dun care at all and u are just another organism among the thousands in that person's life. Though u qualify as 'fren', but u belong to the cathegory of 'acquaintance'. There's a microscopic percentage that that person lying, but still, its microscopic. Therefore being totally and entirely devoted to that person is abit pointless and insane. I know, dramas and movies always portray that in the end after donkey years, tat person will realised that u are always there and stuffs like tat, but in real life it doesnt happen that way. Even if in the end u were with that person, tat person is with u because he/she have no more choices or sympathizes with u. Its tat simple.

Its brutal but still i need to say, no matter how huge the rain, if someone does not wanna be hit by even 1 single drop, he or she will never be hit by tat drop.

Been raining continuously for 2 days alreadi and its still raining. And as u ppl mostly kw, im veri sentimental when it rains at nite. As usaul i was tinking about the thing that bugs me the most in all my 23 years of life. Im not whining mind u, im just trying to solve a veri veri difficult life puzzle. And wish me luck, may there be a day when i finally solve tis life puzzle. :)

A huge ulcer under my tongue have been bugging me for the past 2 days. I HATE ulcers, they're damn irritating and take ages to heal, especially on the tongue area. I have applied salt, bonjela, watermelon powder, they all dun help much although they did help abit. Therefore i have been toking like some retarded cow with too short a tongue. Damn sianz, i couldnt even work because my line of work needs my oral skills. Oral skills is verbal skills, not the 'other' oral skills. LOLX

K lah, its abit late le, i guess its time to sleep. I have lots to blog, but well, dreamland needs a superhero. :p

Jason's Famous Quotes: 心雨永远都淋不到不想被淋到的人.

Did You Know?: Salt melts slugs and snails.

RESERVIST

Nxt week going back for reservist. Fark. Need to go back to camp and cut hair. FARK LAH. zzz
Alrite, so lets recap wat happened. Ytd went shopping because got my pay le. Tis time, its budget mode. lolx. I spent around $100 onli ytd. Bought a watch, 4 t-shirts, a aviator sunglass and ate good food also. muahaha. :) The aviators cost $12, the watch $10, the heineken and redbull t-shirts were $22, and finally 2 hangten 'BIGFOOT' t-shirts for $10.80. LOLX. Ate carls jr for $12.80, then ate Ben & Jerry's phish food cone $4.50. Hmms, not recounting its not even a 100 bucks. lolx. Super budget. But i LURVEEEE my heineken t-shirt, damn nice sia. The glasses also super nice, damn cool. :) Now the final piece of the puzzle is a change of hairstyle and colour.

Wootz, new image when skool starts. though i will most prob be as fat, but will slowly slim down cause nowadays keep going gym and pool to train. heehee. I still have 60 days left. My results came out the day b4, and i got a 2 distinctions and 2 credits. Fark one lors, my result sucked. Accounts and Stats should get High Distinction, yet i onli got Distinction. The my OB and BC totally screwed up, onli got credit for them. Kaoz. It seems i still cant keep my promise to get all HDs for my subjects. I failed, i cant even keep a simple promise. haiz.

After the results came out, went to have dinner with my OG group supposingly, but when i reach there, its onli the guys. lolx. Onli rei, nich, XH and ah tan there, lolx. But nvms lah, for watever reason the others were not here i dun care, cant realli tink too much rite? heehee :)

Okays, so now we come to my farking tagboard. I tink its faulty sia, sometimes cannot tag lor, nb i wanna reply ppl also hard. Most prob if tis continues i will change tagboard. -.-"

Well, i shall reply tags in my entries for the time being. A anonymous tagged and poped tis question to me ---> ( if you meet someone whom has the sweetest smile, good character, intellectual n always looks at life positively, would you go for her? even if you might not haf the time, effort n $$ to commit in a love relationship, plus the status btw the other person different from one another......would you? )

Answer: Yes. Sounds selfish, but yes. I will definitely go for her. Time is under ur own control, if u truly feel for her, u WILL make time for her. Effort comes naturally if u truly like her, dun say u dun have the effort, if u like her, then do something for her. And finally for money, tat's the most problematic part. No money, its realli quite hard, lolx, but its also the problem with the simplest solution. Go work part time or watever to get money ba. :)
As for the status, when u like someone, there's no status to consider. U are who u are, if she likes u, she likes u for who u are. If she tinks u're not worthy, then in the end, how worthy is she? All human beings are borned equal, hence dun feel inferior. But before starting anything, pls pls pls ensure that u like her for HER, not because she is pretty or have big assets. Give sometime to tink about why u like her. Onli when u confirm that u are sincere then go for it. If not, dun even start.

The above question made me tink about adel again, she is all the above, and the status gap is personified by the invisible barrier between us. Okays, enough about her, toking about her fills me with ... well...a sense of loss. Haiz. Somethings in life juz doesnt go ur way, no matter how sincere u are....


Jason Famous Quotes: Like poles repel, Unlike poles attract.

Did You Know?: Apply Vaseline on the ends of your hair to prevent split ends. :)

Totaled

Yawnz, tiring day, was supposed to go swimming with stuart in the noon. Last min stuart called to say he's going earlier because MC dun kw how to swim and he needs to protect him.. -.-"" Gay shits. lolx. But i told them to go ahead because i needa sleep more. Sleep is the most important aspect in my life according to me. muahahah. :)

Whole day rot at home till round 6pm went to meet peter to la kopi. Still fun and nice to chat with peter after sometime, chatted on some simple issues in life and recapped about life in sungei gedong last time. lolx. Tomolo morning going to the new gym with richard and zhengyi because we are all getting fatter by the day. Richie is not fat lah, but he's starting to become abit chubby ( according to him) and zhengyi belongs to the same cathegory as me --> Fat Fug. LOLX

Alrite, lets take a look at my busy scheldule ba. Tomolo not working, wed most prob not working also because im bringing corinne to office for training in the noon and meeting the OG ppl for dinner at dhoby ghaut. Results coming out the same fateful day and so i hope can pass ba. Then on thursday go back office again to get pay and see how much i get ba. Haiz, didnt take account of the days i worked so i dun realli kw how much i will get. smart rite? zzzz.

Im starting to like my blog, it simply oozes honesty and there's no trace of any fakeness here. What u see is wat u get. Im fat, i admit. Im farked up, maybe. But im honest no doubt. Why hide what u tink? Voice it out and let ppl decide whether they agree or disagree lor. Some theories or mentality may be wrong, and hence they need correcting. Controversy creates conversations and therefore we can fish out the psychological tendencies of a individual by gathering the reactions. :) Was chatting with peter just now when he was telling me he's gonna start a blog soon and he didnt want a dry and boring blog. lolx. Was telling him to either do a blog on psychology (tat's wat he studies) or some controversial issue so that it wont be boring. And then i reflected on my blog at the same time while chatting with him. heehee

Alrite, lets get down to business. New theory time! Watched Superman Returns on my PC ytd nite and was tinking about superheroes. Was 'paying my water tax' in the toilet when i suddenly realise wat is the most valuable item in the world. The most valuable item in the word is dependent on the degree of need of the item. Its realli simple, wat u need most at a particular moment translate into the valuation of that item. Ask urself this, when u have a million tons of gold in the desert and u have no water, is water more valuable then gold? Or when u are alone on an island without food but full of diamonds, wont a single bread be worth the world to u? Therefore i came up with tis theory that the valuation given to a entity is directly proprotionate to the level and degree of need of that entity at a tranfixed timeframe. Yupz. Its completely correct from my perception, if u tink there's some variations or have objections to this theory, feel free to tag and reason with me. heehee :)

Jason's Famous Quotes: When ppl run out of quotes, they crap.

Did You Know?: True intent will be revealed during adversity.

Essensification

Tired legs, sore mouth and heavy eyes. Tat's the toll work has took on me. Im damn tired todae at work sia, keep stand there promote cards and walking around spying on the stewpid kids tat were doing a OCBC assignment. Was posted to IMM todae with shane and edmund, all guys, good to tok cock and crap rubbish with. Look at gals, give comments, relate to past humourous examples (if any), then stare blankly into the crowd looking for a potential customer. Whole day was repeating tis routine until boss called and told me to go spy on some kids he employed to give flyers. Spied and felt like a fat 007 doing a FATSINO ROYALE. okay, not funny. nabei. -.-"

Top sales among the guys todae mainly due to my exceptional luck. I mean when 'edmund-and shane-stopped-customers, they-come-directly-to-me-and-asked-me' kind of luck. Wat fark man, should have bought TOTO or 4D todae, most prob will tio. heehee. :P Alrite, lets come back to what i've been thru tis few days. Yesterday ( friday) was at wisma atria's 'outside-mango' booth and tat place totally sucked. I hate outdoor roadshows cause i keep sweating and become sticky like glue. Then i totally no mood to work at all. completely totally no mood. So my sales sucked ytd, juz 2 sales as compared to todae's 14. :)

I guess when a person is tired, he starts to tink about some life issues. At least that's wat i am, when im realli tired, i recap on wat my whole life was about and the ppl in my life tat made a inpact. Todae was one of the days when i was realli tired and burned out. Was on the shuttle bus from IMM to Jurong pt after work juz now, and was recapping about my army life. On the 11th dec, im going back for reservist, and they say 'PLS COME WITH A DECENT HAIRCUT AND NO DYED HAIRS'. Fark, my beautiful long hair is going to get sniped off? no way lors, im totally sianz about tis, i want my long long hair lors. was planning to dye it ash blonde (refer to previous entry) lors, kaoz. Anyways, was tinking about army and the changes it brought to me. I matured quite abit inside army, but still im lacking in some aspects that im currently learning slowly.

The other time when i was realli tired was after the first dragon boat training during my poly days. I ran and ran till i sort of felt giddy and lacked oxygen sia... Then after the training was weights session. Gosh by the end of the training, i take the bus home also nua like dun kw wat sia. lolx. damn funny, when i was giddy, the onli thing on my mind is huimin sia. sort of dumb but its true, my whole mind is huimin during that short period of time sia. lolx. Anyways that was the past lah, during my poly days lors, so many yrs ago. :)

My msn nick is still counting down to her bday although i kw we cant click. Its a deadline for me to change myself and till the countdown is up, im not going to go after any gal at all. I must have the discipline to stay true to just one, so this period will be a buffer period for my change. Yes i admit i do look at gals and sometimes do fantasize abit. But i kw deep in my heart that i will not go after anybody till the countdown is up. Simple. 66 more days to go. Wish me luck.

Now we come to a topic tat is quite interesting, at least to me.
*Disclaimer: What is said is wholly my childish tots and does not stands for the truth.*

Gals like to get cheated. Gals cannot stand honesty. Gals like hypocrites(i forgot the spelling). Gals like jerks. Gals tink jerks are good guys until they get cheated and realised tat the jerk is a jerk. Gals cant stand honesty, they want a hypocritical guy that seems nice and frendly and they tink he is a good guy.

Guys are evil. Guys like to cheat gals(nothing else to cheat). Guys refrain from honesty. Guys tink they are good guys. Guys tink they are the best(ego). Guys like to act and live behind a mascarade. Guys are 99.9% horny (yesh, including monks). Guys over fantasize. Guys want a girlfrend that is pretty, sexy, willing-sex partner with a no-resposibility tag.

The above is what i derived from a sample taken from the people around me, so might not be true. Anyways, as i was saying, guys like to act nice to a gal first, then slowly go in for the kill. especially towards pretty gals. I was like tat. I am no like tat now. treating someone nicely from the bottom of ur heart is much more important then just putting up a nice front. Yes i kw, most gals are suckers for hypocritsy, but u cant blame them, they were made like tat. Same with guys, we were made horny and nothing can stop us, no even buddha. Its onli how strong ur willpower is to control ur horniness. lolx. Anyways, i realised some ppl are slowly falling into traps made by guys, and i totally see everything unfolding as what i have predicted. But i dun tink i should say anything, because the person wont believe me anyways. :) But all the matured gals i kw have been cheated by a jerk b4 and they grew up from tat incident. So i do have the conclusion that gals onli grow up and understand the cruelty of the world after being cheated by a guy. They kw the beri simple logic tat a guys word is 98% lies, 1.95% crap and 0.05% truth.

Always remember, onli 0.05% of a guy's words are true when they tell u how much they love u or watever their brain can tink of. Im a guy and im guilty of that also. But i dun care, i wanna be honest and put everything down here so tat the person tat is supposed to see it will see it a pull the brakes in time. Anyways to that person ---> good luck, have fun. :)



Before wrapping up everything, i juz wanna inform my dear diary tat im considering taking up photography as a hobby. I wanna capture the emotions, beauty and ugliness of human nature. Most prob will be doing digital photography ( professional cameras are too expensive, especially the pic-developing part.) for a start and maybe i should get a good digital camera soon. :)

Jason's Famous Quotes: Naivity is a double-bladed sword.

Did You Know?: The best investment in any business is ur heart and soul.

Controversy

My hair is getting longer by the day. Lost my wallet ytd. Someone found it and info counter returned it to me. Money and EZlink gone. IC and 11B intact. Total fortune around $20+ gone, but IC and 11B intact, so at least wont get fined $100. -.-" But the thing that matters most is the wallet itself, its a gift from my OG frens. No matter what ppl tink, i realli do treasure it alot.

Met up with yuyun todae while im working. lolx. I went MIA for 30 mins and when i went back got a scolding from raquel. lolx, she's not realli evil lah, i kw she backstabs and likes to quarrel, but aunties are like tat one mah, rite? hahasss. so anyways let her lors. I've been working in the company for around 3 weeks now and i sort of seen thru some ppl rite from the start le. All my classmates have a job of some sort and everybody is busy earning money to fund the nxt semester. Realised everybody have their lives to lead (duh~~~) and their own problems (fark me...zzz).

In my line of work, i met another guy that i wanna hoot( as usaul~~). Tat guy, he watch out ba, he snatched my fren's sales and he tinks he is beri zai. Shall i show him my dark side? hmms, lets see how the thing goes ba, he's abit small size, so i dun wanna resort to violence if possible, he might die after taking a blow from me. ^_- Okay, now i finish complaining about tat fugger le, feels abit better ba. lolx.

Toked to ah wei abit about my business idea, and for once, he agreed with the plans. lolx. He is a beri pessimistic person and for him to agree it realli realli must be a veri good venture.. -.- And i will be roping in elissa and one more person to set up a 4 person partnership ba. Ah wei is my best bud, and i kw he have a veri cautious and sound mind, he's like someone tat pulls me back to earth everytime i fly too far. Elissa is a veri responsible and trustworthy person, though i've onli kwn her for half a yr, i kw i can trust her with important jobs. :) And the last person i will find is either stuart or richard. Richard is also someone i can trust to do the job rite, stuart also is a veri entrepreneurial guy i kw tat is dependable, but he have a 20% tendency to run off with money.. -.-"" lolx

Tomolo is not working, so have lots of time to rot at home. heehee. Will need time to watch miami vice and a korean movie. lolx. And well, after the loss-of-wallet incident, i learnt to TRY to not take things for granted. heeheee. And my job is quite enriching, because i always seem to get professional ppl ( eg: bosses, pilots, general manager etc.) for customers and i like to tok to them and get to kw their life experiences and what they went through. I learnt alot from them and when we're done with the forms and mailing, a good handshake to seal the deal is wat i always do. A good handshake signifies wat makes a man and how successful u are, i like the feeling of a successful handshake. :)


Jason's Famous Quotes: Luck is the rare phenomenon when the enviroment changes to suit the man. ( My veri own statement when i was in sec 4. heehee :P)

Did You Know?: When i dun show my dick doesnt mean i dun have one. Same for temper.

Playlists

Habit. When im bloggin, i always like to listen to my special 'sentimental' songlist. lolx. Brings me into the mood to blog. Well well well, so u ppl wanna kw wat's in my playlist rite? hahass, it changes periodically but there's a few songs that are basically 'embeded' in the list and wont change no matter wat. Before i continue, tis is a sentimental entry, so dun tell me not to blog about love and romance, im onli stating the reasons for the songs, not on a emotional basis. :)

Alrite, fo those of u tat dun kw, i had an entry in the past denoting that i have songs that remind me of somebody. Meaning that some songs always brings back memories of some particular person in my life, and yes, those ppl im toking about is gals in my life. Most ppl just listen to songs and like the songs, but i for one will always attribute a song to the ppl that made a significant impact on my life and they did play a part in forging me as wat i am todae. Okays, enough with the long winded explanations, i shall list out my playlist nxt.

My Playlist :

Adeline's
1) Liu Geng Hong - Cai Hong Tian Tang >>> Tis song reminds me of adeline. Alot.

2) Zhou Jie Lun - Feng >>> Same as above, because its a prelude to cai hong tian tang's mtv.

3) Cao Ge - Superwoman >>> The onli time we went for ktv session, she said she wanna listen to tis song, so i sang tis song for her. Though its a small thing and i sang like a dog, meant lots to me.

4) Lin Junjie - Zhi Dui Ni Shuo >>> Tis is obvious, i said sa lang hae you is onli for her, and its realli onli for her. This is the song that i will never ever forget for life. never, ever.

5) Aaron Kwok - Deng Ni Shuo Ai Wo >>> Well, tis is wat i hope for, but i guess it wont happen after all... will it?


Corinne's
1) Sammi Cheng - Mut Kai >>> A canto song, corinne is the onli one that sings and listens to cantonese songs with me. Its her favourite song.

2) Zhang Dong Liang - Ji Mo Bian Jie >>> A song she cherished when the one she loves cheated her. Yet she dun kw that someone else was there for her all along then....

3) Li Sheng Jie - Shou Fang Kai >>> When i finally got over her, tis song realli helped me alot because i told myself giving up means giving her happiness. Turns out that i am wrong. -.-"

Huimin's
1) Chen Xiao Dong - Tie Xin >>> The first song that started me on pop music. Its the first song on the first CD i bought and the first time i fell for a gal.

2) Chen Xiao Dong - Ai Ni Duo Ni >>> Totally wat i was doing during that period in sec skool. lolx, its quite funny tinking about how shy i was back then in sec skool. hahass...

3) Jacky Cheung - Ni Zui Zhen Gui >>> Her favourite during that period of time.

4) Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go On >>> This song is sang during sec 3 orchestra camp, the first time she held my hand and led me to dance with her....

Alrite, the rest i nxt time then type ba. Getting late and tml im working. How i wish i can rot at home and money will come rolling in. lolx.. alrite, tink too much. hahasss :P Anyways, the above is onli reasoning for why i like the songs, not some sort of declaration of love of watever those shit brains can imagine. Dun be so complex mentally, be simple, tink simple. :)

(While working ytd, someone told me about someone and i was abit surprised that that someone the someone was toking about chose that something that im using now. So to that someone, thks. I know i couldnt tell tat someone verbally, so i thank tat someone here ba. ^_^)


Jason's Famous Quotes: Man forgets but nvr forgives, woman forgives but nvr forgets.

Did You Know? : Music is the best language ever invented by man. Yes, its a language.

Time & Tide

Its those nites again. Emotional high-tide again. Or maybe call it loneliness ba. Hmms, sometimes i realli wish there was someone by my side that i can share my woes and happiness with. I know there's always frens, but there's some things that even the bestest of frens will not understand. Yesterday nite had a veri veri funny dream, i dreamt of someone in the past. hahass, its abit ironic and sudden. But the past seems to be coming back in my dreams these days. Hmms, izzit time to confront all those past memories and sort things that i left dangling in the past?

The logic of the world is veri simple, you can never escape from things and events, they will eventually come back to haunt u for a solution. Yet toking about tying up loose ends is much more simpler then actually doing it. After all that i've gone thru, i now understand how come ppl dun wanna grow up. With age comes resposibilities, and some responsibilities can never be fulfilled. Tell me someone who is at the age of 23 and has no problems at all, i will swallow my monitor on the spot if someone like tat exists. I dun fear problems, they forge a man out of a boy. I believe humans are meant to go thru hardships and learn from the experiences, we are after all animals, primal instincts will alway be present to make us seek the easy way out, yet to overcome these instincts will bring us further from barbaric customs.

Im philosophising more and more these days, am i getting older and thinking much more? hmms, nvms, shall tok about something more jovial. Am planning to revamp my doghole, need to go ikea to shop for some cheap furniture( especially a dbl decked bed with a sofa below), then go downstairs buy some paint. Also require a huge beanbag to sit on and slack to play ps, and if i have some money left, will proceed to buy some carpets to put on the floor. Anyways, will find time to draft out and measure the dimensions of my room and find the perfect furniture for my room. Im a engineer remember? hahass :P i tink all the above will happen just b4 chinese new yr, when i've saved enough. Im tinking of painting my room lime green and buying some glass furniture, which will have a elegant and simple classy touch to it. Table, chair, cabinets all made of glass or fibreglass, all transparent. And the new bed frame i shall choose white to complete the clean look. clean and simple. Wootz, CLASS. But i calculated the budget to be around $1000 bugs.... fugging ex man..

Measured biceps todae, shrinked till cannot alreadi, was 14.8 inches during peak, now its a meager 12.1.... The waist still okay, nvr increase but still as fat. Weight maintained but i guess its more fats then muscle mass. Health-wise, i tink im declining alreadi. Will be dead by 50yrs old if i dun do something soon. lolx. The worse is im gonna fail my ippt! FUG! Remedial Training, here i come!

Jason Famous Quotes: Being touched by an angel also means u are under the curse of the angel.

Did You Know? : Melt someone's heart too much, and u will drown in it.

V . U . L . G . A . R

Alrite, i kw people are beri happy that im back again. lolx. Thks to jer, he helped me got back my net till 25th, muahaha, heng last time i helped him b4. wootz. Well , tis 2 weeks i've been rotting at home playing final fantasy XII since i have no net. thk god that FF came out on tat day i got DCed, at least i wont die from boredom at home.

Well, yesterday or should i say saturday, i started work at the credit card company. Elissa introed me and the ppl inside are still alrite, but thing is im still quite slack. muahaha... :P
I knew a guy from on my first day of work and alreadi im starting to refrain from speaking with him too much. In my honest opinion, he likes to talk nonsense and is beri loud, just like me in the not so long ago past, i do tok rot and cock sometimes, but im trying to crap less unless im with ppl like kuku or the buds. I discovered that people dislike overly noisy individuals, so im lucky to have noticed in time, and when he started babbling about his achievements and whatever stuffs i further saw another me in him. Proud and ignorant beyond doubt. Lolx, shyts, am im critising myself or him sia, hahhasss, maybe its good to look back and compare who u WERE and who u ARE.

But seriously when he toked to me, i juz silently smiled back and gave 1 word replies, it realli personifies the incredible childishness and lack of maturity. Im not beri matured, but yet i can seem so much more mature when compared to him. I finally understood and saw why i am labeled childish by her in the past. I do agree now. Okies, enough bad toking about people, im actually analysing myself more then him. hahassss.. :P

Work so far is still alrite, but the long standing hours are abit shag. I tink if i continue with tis job, i most prob will slim down provided im not working with kuku. lolx. Sat i worked with her and she turbo wanna eat tis and eat that, so as usual, being with her = eat and become fat and complaining about it at the same time. LOLX. Todae i worked alone with some people i didnt kw and i onli ate a bowl of noodle from 11am to 9.30pm. wee you wee, no food lors, onli drink water nia. lolx. tml i wanna go swimming, but stuart is having lessons. So in the end i tink i sleep thru the noon and then wake up start my weights ba. Should start weights le, (again...) i farking hell have no determination lors, i keep skipping my weights sessions man, how the fish am i going to be more defined and lose the stewpid fats off my farking face? zzzzz i onli have 85 days left lors... cb one, i dun like to curse but i realli farking hate my attitude sometimes. Discipline is realli not my forte, i need a discipline master.... or on second tots, a discipline mistress.... lolx :P

okay, now we come to the lewd part, for those ppl that cannot take it, dun read. i repeat, dun like? dun read, wanna read, swallow it whole.

Knew a guy called ah-cai on sat on the job, fun guy, abit egoistic but overall a okay dude. He lives in hougang and me in boon lay. so on the job, we obviously oggle at lots of gals since we are doing sales, and we came to a conclusion on a veri peculiar occurance. Gals from the east side have bigger boobs then other areas of singapore. We are not perverts lah, but generally speaking from our observations. Is it the water there? or the food there? Is it that the water content is different tat's y it encouraged growth? hmms....I tink they should do some research into this phenomenon and find out the truth and reason behind it. lolx....

Alrite, enough lewd jokes. Lets go to something more interesting. Its philosophy time again! wee you wee! On the mrt trip home, i philosophied a new theory, called the Persisten-turity Theorem. It denotes that no matter at what stage of maturity someone is, he/she will always have a immature counter personality in him/her. And in order to balance out psychologically, the person have to release the immaturity on something or someone. Some ppl play games and display childish emotions like scolding and insulting the other gamers. Alot of other ways are also commonly seen, and i do observe them in ppl. So u might see a cool guy being cold and manly, but when he watches soccer, he instantly become a hallowing and noisy retard. Understand? :)

by the way, the heading have nothing to do with the entry content, i just tink it looks cool. heehee. :p

Jason's Famous Quotes: Responsibility and Sincerity are not consistent.

Did You Know? : Some homosapiens are only partially evolved. Mentally.

Examinotopy

Im am blogging from skool. If u guys noticed, i've been missing online for a few days alreadi. lolx.
the reason is beri simple, i nvr pay bill mah, so my connection tio cut. hahahass... farked up feeling lors, i need a job that pays fast cause i want my net back, without net life is sooooo no life. At nite cannot play games with the guys leh, damn sianz. Realised i took my net for granted le, lolx, didnt knew i grew so attached to the net. especially msn, when everynite i will update the days left in the countdown. But fraid not, i have made a mental note on the days left alreadi, so the date will be accurate when i get my connection back. wootz.

As a side note, i juz finished my final paper and i tink its farked up. haiz, all my papers i tink is farked up, am i overworried or juz simply silly? Nvm ba, shall not say more. The more i ponder, the more sianz i am. Yesterday finally started on my routine again after slacking for so long for the exams, i am getting fatter and fatter... zzzzz.... nvms, the swimming pool beside my house is opening soon, and that translates to daily swimming and tanning for me! wee you wee! I dun like to run, but i love swimming, the tranquility that comes with being underwater is realli so soothing mentally. Eat less train more, i have 94 days left.

I am wat i am and i like wat i am, mentally tat is. One thing i learnt in life is dun assume. Assumption screwed me in a couple of times. When u dun kw somebody, dun pretend to kw him/her, trust me, dun try it. And to pick up the pieces after that is realli tedious and tiring, but u kw u cant leave it there, its like some thing pricking periodically at you mentally. Its okay if u dun realli care about that person, but that person keeps poping up in ur head every now and then, that is wat i call torture. Psychological burden they call it, and its not something u can put down, the only solution is to SOLVE the problem. Okies, that ends the psychology lesson for todae.

Jason's Famous Quotes: The Moonlight Shadow is a replicant of the moon's essence.

Did You Know? : Lust is the primary motivating factor for men pertaining to commercials.

Powers!

Todae accts exam. No stunts this time, relatively easy but thanks to farktart me, i tink im failing tis one. zzz.... let me tell u why, i nearly didnt went for the exams todae because i remembered someone telling me accts is on tuesday.... kaoz, heng ytd midnite i SUDDENLY wanted to see the exam timetable, maybe its my spider-sense or my extrasensory-perception at work ba. lolx. Anyways thanks to watever caused me to check, i went for todae's exams with juz 3 hrs preparation. Knn i didnt study for accts fully lors, i tot still got 1 more day to choing mah.... zzzz

This few days have been downloading movies to watch, i watched LONG HU MEN, SHINOBI, WO HU le, all dvd quality ones... wootz... lolx... and now i have THE HILLS HAVE EYES, and POPULATION 143 and RE-CYCLE to watch. muahaha........piracy is fun! Anyways my fren and i had tis beri intellectual conversation tat day regarding piracy and ethics and everything, in the end we came to tis conclusion --> piracy is a reaction move to counter the ever-rising price of stuffs. The companies and other entities are fleecing consumers more and more, i understand they say tat costs are rising on production and stuffs, but come on, who sets the benchmarks? They themselves set the benchmarks. so in the end, they are unreliable sources of benchmarking. And since the masses have no way out, they resort to piracy. If they reduce the price of original stuffs, who wouldnt buy them? Its because their greed prevents them from reducing the price and its a cheaper alternative to launch anit-piracy campaigns as compared to harming their profits. hmms.... at least that's the outcome from the discussion. Maybe we should analyse tis perspective again ba. lolx.

Ya, as i was saying, i keep going to macdonalds near my house to study with stuart sia. lolx, i didnt realli know tat we will click well because last time in poly i used to condemn him. hahasss, i still remembered when we went to gym with ah wong last time, stuart always complain about tired and he couldnt even lift 5kg.... -.-""" gosh.... but now he's running alot le, so in short he is fitter then me, im a fat fark. zzzz... But anyways, we click quite well, and we always discuss intellectual stuffs that most other guys dun discuss de. Sometimes we do tok about gals, but i always try to change the subject or remind him tat i dun wanna tok bout gals. What for tok so much about something u dun have? And when i tok, i tink, i dun wanna tink about other gals, 1 is enough. Just 1, no more. ^_^

And let me tok abit about the 1 and onli can? hahass, todae when i was going home, i saw a adeline look alike on the bus. kaoz, super look like her lors, from all angles also look like her, but is younger version lah, around 17-18 yr old ba. then on the same bus at the traffic light, a boon lay garden school bus with the logo stopped beside my bus. Gosh... boon lay garden instantly reminded me of huimin... lolx.. i remebered i even went back on teacher's day with her to her primary skool when we were sec 3... hahass... the good old days.... kks, enough, if not peter will say i keep tok about love le. hahass.. :P

And to end this long entry, i smashed my knuckle ytd -.-... nb i was walking pass my sandbag, so i casually threw a few straights, but i sort of got over enthu and smashed the side of my knucle against the bag.... knn i jittao high and my hand instantly orh-chean lor.... so pain sia, now i cannot punch, if not hand will pain.. zzz... need at least 1 week to recuperate ba... haiz..... sad....

Jason's Famous Quotes: The person u hate most might actually be your life partner next time...

Did You Know? : My ancestors was traditional chinese physicians.... 0.O

Jasonisitivity

Todae was OB exam. I tink i most prob failed it. The format was entirely not the same, and im supposed to be veri prepared for it, because i did put in effort to study. Yet once i entered the exam hall, my brain seem empty and i cant realli tink of watever i have remembered. And the most surprising thing is the questions are totally different from all the past year questions. Moral of the story, someone pulled a stunt on us. All of my frens cannot cope with the paper, not even one told me he/she is confident of securing a distinction, much less a high distinction. Why? OB is supposed to be my most passionate module this semester and im supposed to get a high distinction for every module. I once told her that i will strive to get high distinction for all my modules and get a degree with a high distinction, but it seems my abilities arent proving my promises. Disappointment always visits at the strangest times, and its like deep into the night le... -.-""

Tomolo need to study accounts le, i realli hope for my other paper, i can do well.... i realli dun wanna default on my promise....

Alrite, this few nites, beetles or some sort of unknown bugs have been flying into my room. They are big, hard and can fly at amazing speeds. Totally irritating. I can bear to kill them by smashing them, cause its beri gross, so in the end, i used a zip lock bag to catch them all, gotta catch them all! ( pokemon anyone? -.-"") right now i have a proud collection of 4 in my bag within 2 nites, and they are still alive and kicking.... gosh, they are hardy creatures ya?

How many of u imagine and fantasize and reflect? Do u tink about the day's event and recap the happenings like a recorder and start to analyse ur own behaviour patterns and reflect on them? Sometimes mentally im like a pool of stagnant water, and that is the perceived equilibrium that i always seek. With nothing mentally, no mental burden, no complex psychological issues, life is so much simpler. Some people managed to maintain and lead a life without any worries, but those people are much more naive. i guess its a fair deal, u earn social and life experience then u trade off ur simplicity and pureness of heart. Its a matter of survival in the world after all, a simple and pure heart wont get u anywhere, deceit and hypocriptical guides and leads u to your specific desires. OMG, OB again... fark... zzz, y am i so flooded with OB man, fark lah....zzzzz

Not in a good mood to blog, so shall stop here. Wish me luck for the remaining exams.

Jason's Famous Quotes: Promises are NOT meant to be broken. (I erred, so im trying not to break one again... sorri bro, im still guilty for tat event.)

Did You Know?: I have a pepper lunch coupon valid until 10th december 2006...

Screwed

Just reached home from school. Todae was accts revision lesson and its sort of boring, because balwant onli went thru a few questions then proceed to have consultation session. hmms.... After tat, went to study with alina and elissa. Halfway thru our studies in the study room, there was tis malay guy that tinks he is the boss and storms out of the room claiming we were noisy. -.-" I do admit initially ben was abit noisy lah, so ben went to apologise to that guy, he gave attitude to ben and when told me i was veri buay song alreadi. Ben was saying 'if last time me, i will hit him alreadi', and mentally im like 'haiz... dun so kiddish leh... -.-""'...

Then the storming off came when ppl left and entered the room, so there was a commotion mah, not our fault le lors. And ben was pissed, so he shouted a 'fuck off' when the pig left the room, after 10 secs, he came back in asking who said tat phrase. I was staring at the pig in the eye because i alreadi hot le, was expecting ben to own up and if a fight ensues, i will step in lor. But to my disappointment, ben kept quiet and looked down on the floor.... gosh... If u said something, u should own up mah, i kw he dun want trouble, but own up lah, dun diam diam sit there like a pigeon mah. I believe in being responsible for what u did and said, if its me, i cfm stand up admit de lor.... -.-""

Anyways, that pig went to complain to the librarian, and when the librarian came up to scold us, one of the guys (i dun kw him) retorted and scolded the librarian for not getting her facts rite and started scolding us. lolx.. damn funny, then people started joining in also telling her the problem dun lie with the people in the room, its tat pig, he's level of tolerance is too low le. hahasss... damn funny.. but i choose to keep my mouth shut thruout the ordeal, because i kw, once i speak, colourful words will come out. So ya, i also became sensitive to people and didnt say anything at all while at the same time analysing the situation.

Hmms, it seems the self-correction is taking effect le, i realli can start to tink in other's shoes. The librarian also quite sad lors, she's onli doing her job and tis is the treatment she got. But it all boils down to the pig lah, if he cannot stand the noise, then go toilet cubicle study lah, there confirm silent one, unless got occasional 'PUUUT!' or maybe a satisfactory 'AAAAHHHH~~~~!!!!'... hahass.....!

I was so amused by the incident that i sort of smiled to myself like a sick bastard while i was staring and studying my OB lors... lolx, why is it so funny rite? simply put, my brain is using OB to analyse that pig's behaviour lors~~ hahass.. ge funny.. ~~~ ( we sort of endangered tat pig's safety needs, so tat will lead to jeopadizing his self-actualization needs and when he left and came back, he wanted to fulfill his esteem needs... LOLX)

Okay, screw him, lets get back to life, exams is onli a few days away, and i havent finish revision or should i say, i havent started on stats and BC yet... fark lah... die le lah....... i kw i wont fail the exams, but i wanna get a HD leh. I gotta put more effort if i wanna get HD ba, i promised her tat i will get HD for all my grades, so i must do it no matter wat. Promises are meant to be kept, and i totally intend to keep these.


Jason's Famous Quotes: Humans like to assume split identities.

Did You Know?: The haze makes people dumber.

Complacense

I have wasted a week. Sad to say its true. a week of my life is spent gaming and not studyin when i should. haiz, ytd go out until super late also. hahasss... But i feel sort of guilty, yet i did wat i did because its ethnical. gosh. Its about sean, eh bro, if u're reading tis, sorri for not making it for ur grandma's funeral ya? im going to a fren's birthday at nite so i cant go to a funeral then go ppl's bday, hope u understand bro. Chill man, dun tink too much yeah?

Anyways, b4 heading over to jean's bday, went back to NPS to see how's the Family Concert getting along. Saw the usaul suspects ah kuang and zhaorong there, and james was there again. lolx. The dumb guy that bought APOLLO CAKEs for our concert 4 yrs ago as refreshments. LOLX.... recalling it makes go gaga, lolx.. still remember jiayan's astonish face when tat fruitcake reported back with 2 bags of APOLLO! LOLX.... Where got ppl so stewpid one? hahass... was recounting the incident with zhaorong ytd at the concert and we laughed like crazy. hahasss...
But the sad thing is most of the alumnis didnt realli came back to the club. haiz... time realli tears people apart. The times with ah pin and the guys, strumming and singing as a group realli brings back memories...Even the period where we were illegally in the music room staying overnight, the horrible nite that all of us were bunched together and not making a sound because EVERYONE of us felt and saw the 'lady in white'.... Fark man, tinking about it sends shivers down my spine especially since im typing tis entry in the middle of the nite. We didnt sleep tat nite, waited for the sun to rise and that sort of took eternity, even going to urine also dun dare... kaoz...

okay, back to the concert, i feel that the standard is not there anymore. haiz... during my time there was still some standard to the pieces and the our techniques and style were also prim and proper, but nowsdays i sort of see alot of slack. Nevertheless, the freshies and the members did their best and i did see some hard work. Good job guys and gals, but the next coming battle is Virturso, i hope the standard is higher, cause Virturso is a formal concert, not like family concert which is informal.

Halfway thru the concert, i gotta run cause im rushing to jean's bday, and when i reach pasir ris park, i farking hell step into a mud pile. knn luckily im wearing flip flops but the mud flooded my jeans and foot, i hate that kind of nua nua squishy feeling. So in the end, i lan lan went to toilet to wash up lor. Then finally went to the BBQ and eat some beehoon then stand around see the guys do funny stuffs. As usaul, alot of ppl were looking at rei , i was sort of people-watching and stoning around therefore casually noticed the glances. lolx, standard ba, rei is yandao and he's a good person, at least better then me tat is. hahasss. ^_^ Then after that, we went out in 3 cars and did some late nite activity. Visit a multiracial temple, haunted places, see bapo and geylang-rians, and finally eat tau hui. Fleeting glances and distain mixed with curiosity. So i reached home at around 5am. Once i woke up i played game again. lolx.. bad student. :P

Tomolo MOST PROB will do some running and maybe a round or 2 of shadow-boxing ba, if im in the mood maybe even heavy bag training? lolx... but i tink the highest possiblity is me slacking off the day AGAIN. grrr... i have a deadline to meet and here i am, slacking like mad. Cannot be complacent le ba, i onli have 111 days left. kks, must persevere! GRRRAH!


Jason's Fabulous Quotes: A change of pace in life will yield both detrimental and incremental behaviours.

(NEW!) Did you kw? : Ramli burgers supposingly funds a cult. O_o

Irony

I feel so misunderstood sometimes. Human beings like to jump to conclusions. That is confirmed. Why judge a person so quickly? How deep do u kw that person? Im not trying to hit back or anything, ask urself deep inside, are u superficial? I know i am, sad to say, im among the most superficial among homosapiens. But i know that, and i try to know more about ppl i have a prejudice against, because that is the onli way to overcome stereotypical opinions. Anyways i totally understand some ppl will tink otherwise and think im spouting nonsense again. hahasss, well, my mentality is still beri simple. I am wat i am, and this is my blog. i write what i want and i am what i am. Yes i can change, yes i am changing, but within my soul there is still integrity. Im not a plasticine, i cannot be moulded to suit every single person and i wont. So understand that, and when reading my blog, keep a open mind. Whats the use if u read wat i write, and feel offended and u keep coming back to read and make urself more and more tulanz?

Hao le, the above is food for thoughts, and please dun say i kw gals. i dun kw them at all. if i kw gals that well, why am i still single? Its obvious rite? I dun tink i kw gals well and i certainly dun. Each and every person is different, and everybody went through different upbringing and hence have differing cultures. What is acceptable to someone may not be so for another person. Okays, enough blabbering le. Im tired of typing le. ^_^

Kks, todae went back to skool to finish and hand up my database assignment. Im a last minute man, and therefore, i do things last min. hahasss :P Then at around 6, i took a bus home, and once i reached home, play game! wee you wee! But gaming is starting to get boring le, haiz, i guess things do get boring sometimes ba. But i play play play hor, then lost track of time. Was supposed to go the sean's grandma funeral at 9pm de, then i forgot.. -.-"" But chill, called sean and told him i will b going down tml afternoon. So tomolo will be leaving house at around 3pm ba. Its at woodlands lor.... abit far sia. hahasss.... Then after that will be going back to NP to show face for family concert, then at around 730pm, most prob will leave for jean's bday at pasir ris. lolx. LONG LONG LONG day tomolo, hopefully im still alive by then. wootz. relax.


Jason's Famous Quotes: Time always compels.

Politics!

Hmms, im veri happi, alot of ppl tagging in my board. muahaha! Aiyah, its juz a story mah, lolx, im sooo into story telling rite? hahass. not funny. sua. -.-"" Alrite, if dun blog about love hor, ehs... blog about philosophy want? Anyways i not realli blogging about love mah, its not like im writing which gal i am into rite now and stuff lors, its juz emotional-philosophy lah. But hor, i tink for tis entry i make it more... global ba.

North korea, a country that is virtually a hidden entity in the current modern global village. Its still practicing 'extreme' communism and has a silly looking farktart for a leader. lolx. we have to agree kim-jung-wat-the-fark looks a little nerdy. hahass... anyways, they are currently luring the world to wage war on them by running a second nuclear test. Sometimes it just makes me wonder how silly can they be? Trying to reinforce their ego by doing things that is completely senseless. Why the hell would u wanna incur the wrath of the entire world and expect to survive?

From a economic point of view, north korea is trying to force the US to agree to its demands and give economic aid to help the country. But the fools also should understand, that what happened in iraq can happen in north korea. Well , coming to tink of it, its a totally different context. lolx... contradictory rite? North korea, being a asian country certainly have alot of differences from iraq, and as a side note, we need to understand tat iraq belongs to a specific ethnic group. Hitting on iraq has benefits, while hitting on north korea does not have any benefits, and as we kw, the US always consider gains above anything else. As we can see, hitting on iraq gave the US a hold on the middle eastern oil monopoly.

Coming back to north korea, we understand that the south koreans do harbour a hatred for the US and they consider north korea as a brother although they have a long running war between them. Some south koreans even have relatives over on the northern border, and hence, waging war on them will eventually result in dead relatives. lolx.

So the question now is = will the US attack north korea?
Answer: currently NO. because US have just ended the iraq war, and is preoccupied with the war on terrorism, so resources and manpower wise, they are spread quite thinly. Even if they are realli bent on waging war, they need allies from south-east asian area.

Okay, i kw the above is abit boring, but can lah, that should suffice for now, i can write a entire thesis on the above topic and blabber on and on. But im not going there, cause too long, im dying to sleep anyways. hahass. And one thing about the previous quote, im not a male chauvinist pig, i saw ppl saw tat phrase in a drama, and so i put lor. Its just food for thought, not realli my thoughts. hahass.
(P.S. If its realli true, then i should have melted someone by now....)


Jason's Famous Quotes: Noone totally understands him/herself.

心 雨

Things always come a full circle. And its quite funny sometimes. Let me quote an example, what if there was this person that is changing and waiting for another person, yet the other person, is changing and waiting for another person? hahass... complex rite? actually there's onli 3 person in the loop, and the first person, is realli trying beri hard to change to wat the second person wants, yet the discovery that the second person is changing for a unknown third person sorts of surprised the first person. The first person came to the above conclusion from some unrealible source, maybe its just a song lyric, yet after attempting to decipher what song the lyrics belongs to, the person cant find it. Which means for a veri rare period of time, the second person has shown her thoughts. Is the first person jumping to conclusion? over-sensitive?

Well, lets try to give my example some names. hmms. lets name them A, B and C respectively.
But C is redundant anyways, cause my story revolves around A and B mostly. hahass..
Its sort of sad for A, cause A didnt tell B tat he/she is changing for B, and B wont find out until a specific date. But B is changing for C though, but B understands that its too late now that he/she have changed for C alreadi. So in the end, wat is the answer or outcome of this complex changing and waiting game? And will B ever forgive A and try to give A a chance? Will the rain in A's heart ever touch B?

Hahass, alrite le, enough of complicated examples. kks, todae was a normal day as usaul, started my revision finally. hahass.. 3 chapters of OB... i tink tat should suffice for todae ba, tml need to rush the BC access assignment, so hopefully can finish by tml. ^_^

And ytd i went tanning rite? i tink i over tanned my neck and now its red and itchy... sianz... cannot scratch too much, if not veri ugly... but realli veri itchy mah... sianz... farked up one lah. Maybe im allergic to sunlight? hmms.. cannot be leh.... nah, sua, dun care. by tml will be okay le ba. heehee.


Jason's Famous Quotes: Girls are like ice-cubes, no matter how hard, they will still melt one day.

Monotonotivity

Went swimming and tanning todae. Realised different perspectives yields different reactions. Will let time tell.

Todae's swim and tan was a timely one. Had some time underwater to think again. hahas... water seems to calm my mind and give me alot of space to reflect. The vastness of the pool eventually seems to make my tots bounce around the pool and come back to me. okay. tat description sux. lolx.. kks, so todae went swimming with stuart, and he told me he got kidney stones..-.-....seriously.... he's abit worried lor i can see, but wat to do? i can onli advice and console. hopefully it helps ba.

After tat, we both went to drink papaya milkshake at the hawker centre nearby cause stuart says its good for shitting... -.-"" my frens can be so lame sometimes ya? hahass... Rite now, im downloading the game 'romance of three kingdoms 10' now, and the news reported some ppl were caught downloading music from the net todae. hmms... game is not music, so i wont be caught rite? rite? ya. rite. :P

The haze. i hate it. it made alot of ppl sick and tat is totally fucked up. I dun tink i can write any evil comments on the country tat made the haze here, cause i will go inside sit. so i shall subtly say tat the country is dumb can le. k, end of story. Actually hor, i sort of wanna redye my hair leh, cause the colour is growing out le. hmms... wat colour should i make it leh? hmmm.... gold? nah tat one too ah beng... purple? dun ba, like dog like tat.... red fades beri fast also... haiz... i tink copper brown is still the best for me ba.. lolx...


Jason's Famous Quotes: The world does not need anybody to spin.

Reminisence

Hmms, yesterday went back to NPS for the camp. Corinne was late, so i went in myself first, and i called ah kuang, he told me to help out as a game com... -.-"" My mind goes: ' im a alumni and i came back to catch up with the other alumnis, and nw u call me do sai kang?' . LOLx, but anyways, i helped out cause ah kuang is my best bud in NPS mah, so watever laziness juz sorts of dissipates. Nich and xuanhe smsed me to go ah tan house to play mahjong and to tok things out cause they kw im unhappy with wat happened in the previous entry. But thing is im busy, and im in NP, so i couldnt go meet them. I tink as long as they kw its unfair to do this to me and stop doing this childish stuffs, im glad le, dun need to take any further measures ba.

Up till now, my problems are actually quite transient as compared to my fren's prob. Maybe not fren, acquaintence during NS ba. I read his blog and realised one of his frens juz commited suicide, and he tinks he didnt do enough to stop his foolish act. Therefore he is critisizing himself for not doing more for him. I dun have such a tragic experience b4, hence i will nvr kw wat is the feeling like to lose a fren when u can actually save him/her.

Anyways, back to the camp, they played a murderer/treasure hunt game and as the name suggests, we have to RUN AROUND NP. Gosh, its been 3 yrs and here we go again, running the polytechnic and sweating like a dog once again. hahasss.. corinne and zhaorong was with me and we sort of sweat like mad. Poor corinne, she's having gastric flu and still have to suffer with us. haiz, ke lian de mei ren. hahasss :P Then she left at around 10 when her bf came to fetch her. After that, its juz me and gay zhaorong. hahass... The club's freshies were a veri interesting batch, lolx, they reminded me of myself when i was young and naive. hahass... When the game ended, its alreadi 12 plus so i cant go home. -.-"" Fortunately, ah kuang brought extra clothes, hahass, and so i borrowed his clothes, BUT i have no towel, so after bathing, i used TOILET ROLLS to dry myself. In all my 23 yrs, i have NEVERED dried myself using toilet rolls after a shower, so its quite an experience. ^_^.

After a nice shower, i sat down and had a good chat with ah kuang and company, and naturally, ah kuang asked me now im on which gal. And when i told him i have no gals now and is changing, he thought it was a joke...-.-"" After i told him seriously i realised what's wrong with me, he sort of surprised me yet again. He told me all along, he tot my attitude towards gals last time was fucked up. He told me that i was super ultimate flirt. I can put effort on a gal during a period of time, and infront of tat same gal, i can be veri veri close with another gal. And hence even if some of the gals liked me, they also didnt realli did anything because gals simply dun like flirts.
I took it all well, and i sincerely admitted tat i was wrong. Ah kuang said i had the charm to click with people veri veri quickly, and alot of people got close to me, especially gals, but i did not kw what is the limit to closeness, hence sometimes when the gal i liked saw me so close with another gal, obviously they will be turned off. Alrite, so i nw i kw. Maybe i should ask my close frens out one by one and asked them about myself. hahasss..

After that, ah kuang went to sleep ( he told me to stay for the nite, and he happily went to hug qi mei and went to sleep...) and i there like a dumb dirk. lolx.. so i went to play card games with a few freshies. okay, its not on purpose that they are all gals, but there realli is noone else alreadi. The guy freshies are either asleep, or playing guitar their own guitar at one corner silently. How u expect me to approach them when i didnt played a proper guitar score for almost 3 yrs? And well, i onli played CHOR DAI DI with them lah, nothing much, i mean they are onli 17 yrs old, same age as my sister lah, so i treat them all as sisters. hahass. And i realli did not tink too much this time, i kw im changing and im starting to see the positive effects. ^_^ Its 118 more days and i need to change physically also. I want a near perfect me for that coming special day.


Jason's Famous Quotes: Money is the ultimate god.

Stereotyped

What's the feeling of being ostracized? guess everyone felt it b4? yupz, it sux.

Todae went skool for BC lessons. Was lost thruout the whole lesson because i nvr bring my assignment. lolx. Im getting more and more lazy these days, i dun even wanna update my blog, the deadly slacker virus has caught up with me again. gosh.

Im forcing myself to write something here in case ppl tink im dead or something. As usual, have been tinking and reflecting on some stuffs. Am i MCP? Well, im definitely not, because i dun feel women are inferior. My mum single-handedly brought up my siblings until we are old enough to care for ourselves, whereas my dad onli came back last yr. Who am i to say women are inferior? My mum is a veri good personification of a veri strong and independent woman. Okays, why am i saying this? simply because ppl sort of misunderstood me to be a MCP, i might look like a pig, but im not a MCP. Ppl like to judge without even trying to kw me in depth, and sad to say, i treated them as frens. The disappointment is realli overwhelming, they dun even have to courage to voice it out to me. All along, i've been brought up in a upfront-in-ur-face enviroment, and i appreciate honesty more then anything from frens. Anything not happy, say it out, pull me to one side, tok things out, that would be my preferred move. Im matured enough to receive feedbacks and criticism, i wont be pissed and shout back. And the thing is they dun kw i am such a receptive person, why? They didnt took the effort and time to kw me as who i am. I kw i might spout nonsense and stuffs most of the time, but i realli felt those were jokes, if they feel uncomfortable, they can tell me. Like tat time, i used too much vulgarities, a guy got abit unhappy and told me, and till now, i dun use much vulgarities with him le.

Okies, the above said, lets come back to my boring yet interesting life. Yesterday nite, i was plagued by mosquitoes and couldnt sleep..-.-.. i hate mosquitoes, so many stuffs get extinct everyday, y mosquitoes couldnt be extinct? i mean they are totally useless to the eco system ( okay, maybe as food for some silly bugs) and they are PESTS, even rats have more use then them. I wished someone can wipe out mosquitoes one day. Let them be extinct. Screw the mosquitoes!



Jason's Famous Quotes: One of the greatest pain known to mankind is the pain of betrayal.

Purity

Hearts come in various forms. Mostly tainted, some half half, and a minority pure. Pure hearts come in 2 forms also, one is born pure, 2nd type is bleached pure by someone or some event. Being bleached pure is a veri painful process, and in some cases, there might be scars left in the heart. Okay, the above is not some description of my pain or watever, it just suddenly passed by my brain and i became abit philosophical. lolx...

Okies, onwards with that stuffs. You kw, i just realised something ytd. Tat day i went out with haojun they all, its exactly 127 days to a special day. lolx. and it fits the song by kangta and vanness '127 days' perfectly. hahass.. coincidence? dun tink so, i will change and by the 127th day, hopefully im a new guy that is finally worthy. Sometimes people do say realli harsh stuffs about me, but sometimes they are right lah, its impossible watever ppl say about u is fake de mah. rite? hahasss... right now, its 124 days and counting....

Ks, and from hereforth, we come to the nxt topic. Sometimes, people dun seem to be what they seem to be. And sometimes, a barrier of sorts developed over time due to some silly misunderstandings in the past. The wall will be there, no matter how hard u try to knock it down, the harder u try, the thicker it gets. How to break the wall? simple. time. Time will errode everything slowly day by day. Its the ultimate weapon. Its also a double edged sword, and in this case, it serves a positive purpose. lolx. Hopefully one day when we see each other alone, a simple smile and a simple hi will actually serve to be the first step to breaking the barrier ba. How bad is the barrier? have u ever had pause typing infront of the computer in msn just to tink about wat to say nxt? There is never a lack of topics, its just some things u deem as politically incorrect u dun dare to type it out for fear of irritating the other person.

Okays, enough about philosophy, lets come to the most exciting part, my day! wootz, todae was a fruitful day, whole day at home play game with ah wei and ah leong. lolx.. tat's wat i call fruitful? hahasss realli nua todae lors, i love rotting at home, save money, no troubles, wont eat too much. hahasss.. But seriously, when i wake up later, i need to study abit. lolx. exams are round the end of the mth le, its time to mug again. wee you wee. in all my life, i didnt kw wat is mugging, cause i dun study at all in the past, and tis few mths, i learnt wat is mugging. lolx... god kws wat the fark was i doing in the past. hahasss... anyways, will aspire to get good grades.

Aiyah, dun kw wat else to blog le leh, life is monotonous and peaceful, a tad too peaceful. hahasss... Tomolo go where to study leh? hmms... (124 days...)



Jason's Famous Quotes: Somethings just cannot be forced. Understand that, and u will live a better life.

Insensitivity

Juz reached home from NTU. lolx... ytd went out with kenneth, haojun, clarence and adeline. Went to eat at swensens, after that adeline left us to join her fren. Then soon after, haojun left us too cause he's going home early to pack. Next thing i kw, the remaining 3 of us went to partyworld to sing. wootz.

kenneth is having his own troubles these days, hahass, didnt catch up with him too long and i turn out to be the onli one among them not knowing about wat happened. I guess i spent too much time with my new frens from SIM and sort of forgot about them. hmms, wrong move it seems, cause they do have alot of feedbacks for me too. After KTV, we went to clarence's hostel at NTU to tok cock and by the time we wanna leave, its around 3am le. So might as well sleep in his hostel lors, since his roommate is not coming back. hmms, well, during the tok cock session, they told me something i didnt kw, and im realli glad i went to catch up with them.

Before i left starhub, i sent a onyx msg to the whole starhub customer service. And in that msg, i wrote alot of silly stuffs that are totally redundant. I wanna say sorri to her, simply because i told her a 'sa lang hae yo' at the end of the msg. After i left, everybody was asking her izzit her and stuffs, and she commented if i actually put her name inside, she will instantly quit. Gosh, im so insensitive, seriously, what i tot was romantic and some fucktart stuff actually caused her so much grief. And throughout the whole starhub journey, i did alot for her yes, but i had a motive also. i want her to be mine. that is so absurd and childish. I might not understand her well, but how come i dun even understand myself? now its been around 3 mths since i left starhub, looking back from a neutral perspective, i realised i totally understood how come she didnt accept me at all. Its not the thing i do, she's touched yes, but it juz ends there, how can u be with someone who is so insensitive and didnt realli communicate well?

Clarence and kenneth then proceeded to start a lecture session for me on ethics. I am totally fucked up they say. lolx, and best thing is i agree! Why fucked up u say? they say i like to put my eggs in alot of baskets, meaning the same thing so many ppl told me, im too fickle. I turbo like so many gals, and in the end i sucked. They were quite surprised(i tink) that i dun wanna get a gf now, cause they grew so accustommed to me blabbering about gals. hahahasss. So all in all, insensitivity is one of the many factors that screwed me up.

I agree when i say what's done cannot be undone, no use crying over spilt milk. Yet i just cannot diminish that sense of guilt for her, because of my insensitivity, i made her life miserable in starhub. Hmms, even ytd going out to eat, she also didnt tok much to me, i guess the trauma was too great? hahasss... nvms, i want her as a fren, so will do things to salvage the frenship. What i destroyed with my own hands shall be rebuilt with my own hands.

kks, enough about her, lets tok about kenneth and the other fucktarts ya? lolx. Clarence the dumbfuck is still the same, turbo crapping and super guai lan. lolx.. and he wanted revenge for the 'cartoon t-shirts' comment on my farewell msg. As for kenneth, he wanted revenge because i mentioned he owed me $5 in my farewell msg! LOLX... he says the whole starhub knows he owe me $5. -.-"" As for haojun, he's flying off on the 29th this mth. haiz, he's a smart kid ya? so he have a scholarship to study chemistry at UK's Imperial College, he's sort of invited somemore lors.. lolx... smart ppl... hmms...I kw i can never be that smart lah, but i dun fuck care, my motive is to be rich, not smart.

I am not a goalless guy, i have ambition, i have plans and i have a goal im working towards. I told someone that i will score high distinction throughout my course and get a degree with High Distinction. I intend to keep that in mind, cause whatever i told her must be fulfilled. She might have forgotten it, but still, once i told her, means i must do it. I meant all in all, my grandma is sponsoring my degree leh, although she's rich, i cannot bear to waste her money. Over my dead body. i rather let car bang and turbo run over me then get a mediocre degree and waste the hopes she placed on me. i want high distinction, that is short-term goal. not as in goalkick or soccer, its GOAL. There's no escape. Fuck u HD degree, im coming to get u.

Jason's Famous Quotes: People who read blog and dun tag, most prob squats and shit over a toilet bowl. (dun understand? do u squat over toilet bowls? LOLX)

Peace

Went skool. stats. confused. break. stats. further confusion. dinner at megabites. bus 154. home.

there, it sums up my day. lolx. boring rite? nb one, nowadays super no life like tat. hahass.. but im looking forward to tomolo, cause will be meeting the guys from starhub for dinner. wootz. Initially i tot its an all guys outing, but kenneth suddenly told me adeline is going also. lolx... surprise surprise, but thing is, my heart is cleared le. hmph, wonder how is it going to be tml, treating her as a normal fren. hahass.. well, tat's for tml ba, no point tinking too much though.

Anyways, im super looking forward to see the guy. realli. its been ages le, hahass, the times we spent eating lunch at JVC realli brings back memories. wootz, and then while eating, i will tok about adeline, kenneth toks about yinghwee, llyod toks about her gf. lolx. super funny lors, and they will analyse each other's cases then come to conclusion, tat is wat i call guy's tok. ^_^

Well, enough reminising about those days, tml will see them and possibly go sing ktv. hahass.. yupz, KTV!!! muahaha... tml shall try guang liang's 'ru guo ni hai ai wo' , been listening to tis song for the past few days, its realli nice and emotional. wee you wee. And one more thing, although ppl say i should cut short hair and spike it up, i dun wanna do that. lolx.. i want long hair, like those idol drama actors de. lolx... i kw i dun have the looks, but i dun care, die also need to try once mah. Skooling days are the best time to try out different styles wootz.. ^_^

Alrite, now on a more solemn note.... due to OB, my hit rate dropped... T_T.... its onli 8 hits per sec now.... gosh... there goes my 11 hits per hr... fuck one lor, i trained 2 mths for tat lah, now it dropped back to 8 hits le... zzzz.... sianz, sometimes realli no time to train sia.... plus, i need to find a job soon, the bills are stacking up and im realli worried. no net no phone i will die. its tat simple. I need to find a job. a job. a fucking job. anyone needs promoters? lolx...

My heart feels so peaceful nowadays. hahass.. i guess finally dropping whatever has been bugging me these yrs actually gave me some breathing space finally. The world seems more... open shall i say and certainly im looking further over the horizon. No more jealousies, no more worries on whether i will get the gal i want anot, no more sleepless nites when they get attached, no more trying to get into their good books and the list goes on and on. But there's some stuffs tat i missed though, lolx... when i listen to sad songs nowadays, i dun have a target. -.-"" LOLX...


Jason's Famous Quotes: True Peace Comes From Within You. (太平心境 ， 透彻玉镜)

OBtified

This 2 weeks, OB is my life. I live, eat, shit OB. In case u dun kw, OB means Organisational Behavior. That my frens, is a module in my course. I have been going to Bugis NLB for dun kw how many times le. The feeling initially was totally fucked up, no time of my own during the noons lor, no boxing (tis is the most fucked up part...), no swimming and tanning, no life....

But still, i realised i've seeing alina elissa and nicholas almost every day lor. lolx... thing is i've grown closer to them, they are realli good frens. hahahass.. though during the project, we've seen the ugly side of each other....PUNCTUALITY...
They are fun to be with, and when stressed and tired till the extreme, will do urms... abnormal stuffs... lets list them out shall we???


Operation OB-fication

Operative Name: Nicholas Tong aka Ni Ke La Si
Role: IT Specialist
Abilities:
Spasticasiam ( Can stretch out both hands and shake uncontrollably with eyes rolled up. Ultimate Finisher)
Torso Dancer ( During periods of extreme stress, will listen to retro music and move upper torso retardedly)


Operative Name: Alina Teo aka Banana
Role: Insomnia Zombie
Abilities:
Zombification ( Ability to stone and display zombie-spasticated motion. Highly Contagious)
Illogical Mentality ( Ability to imagine and contort innocent display by mankind)


Operative Name: Elissa Ng aka KuKubird
Role: Sleepyhead / Dumbetinator
Abilities:
Blurtification ( Ability to blurrify any normal circumstances and cause confusion among teammates)
Influenza ( Ability to influence everybody to focus on food instead of task. Extremely Deadly)



LOLX, gosh, how to fail when u have teammates with the above profile? They are the best of the best. hahahass.... but seriously, its been fun having them around, each of them actually demonstrates entertainment qualities. hahass.... and best of all, they all LOVE good food. wootz!
If not for them, i would have threw my OB project away then go one side let wind blow. hahass
kks, now before i go, i shall paste some a picture i took at NLB.

TOTO --- US一体形小便器

Okay, i took tis picture beside the male toilet urinal, i find it super funny. lolx... its states

LOLX? WTF? 小便器?? hahass... literally it means 'machine aiding with urination! WAT THE FUCK? LOLX.....

Jason's Famous Quotes: To live life anew is like being reborn. What is the past, needs to stay in the past.

My First Composition

Todae went to do project until c buay late. so preoccupied with assignments these days, they nvr seem to end. And i got a Distinction for my Stats test, lolx. It the first time i got distinction in dun kw how many yrs alreadi. But thing is, the best is High Distinction, so i still didnt make it.

I realised army do change ppl's mentality. Studies matters, now i kw, i never studied much during all my previous yrs. I just scraped thru my modules and though i never repeated, grades wasnt that impressive. hahass... thing is this, i realli realised juggling studies and play need some skills, and im doing it nicely now, though i still appear damn slack. There's this thing in me telling me to get good grades, and the fact that im paying $5000 a semester totally motivated me to get something out of this. And if u're tinking im too preoccupied with gals to concentrate on my studies, then u're wrong, love is love, studies is studies, they are completely different things.

Anyways i wrote my first song, although there's no melody and tune yet, i did the lyrics le. ^_^
Its about some dude that regrets going into a relationship with some gal and in the end when they broke up, tat dumb fuck got so confused cause he dun kw whether he likes her anot. lolx. But the rest u all intepret urselves ba, i also havent realli refined everything yet, but ya, the lyrics do narrate a story. heehee.


淡淡的优伤带，
着咸咸的泪水，
缓慢的滑过双颊，
眼泪，不是因为你的离去，
而是为了我的无能，我的懦弱。

你要的，我永远无法做到，
无力的我，没有面对自己的勇气，
这是否是命运对我的惩罚，
还是我对自己的钾锁？

成经给你的一切诚诺，
对你说的甜言密语，
连我本身都心存怀疑，
宁视着你远去的背影，
我的心开始寻找伤悲。

一种不能表达的平静，
像黄昏的缅腆缓缓落下，
内疚，是什么情绪？
后悔，是什么感觉？

爱情又是什么呢？
你我之间的是爱吗？
难道简单纯普的爱，
是我们到不了的天堂？

wootz, there, my new song.. hahas... havent tot of a title yet.. hmms.... any suggestions?
hahass... anyways its suppose to be quite sad yet also portray how basket the guy is. Like daniel chan's 'feng yi yang de nan zi' tat kinda feeling. hmms.... well well well, i tink tis concludes another day in my life. wonder how many more yrs can i live? *thoughts running wild*

Jason's Famous Quotes: The root of all problems is you, youself and thy.

Brutality And Honesty

hahahahaha.... hahahaha.... hahahahaha.... im laughing and im smiling. wanna kw what am i laughing at? Im laughing at my stupidity, dumbness and self-deceiving methodology. Well well well, everything started when i was 13, sec 1, and i didnt kw until i saw her again after so many yrs. She determined wat is my 'type' and the blueprint for my idiotic fantasies. In the foodcourt, when i saw her again after so many yrs, things start to flash through mind. And then i saw how stupid i was, blabbering on about gals gals and more gals. childish, dumb and irrelevant...

Simply put, i have too many gals in my life that i was preoccupied with. I fall easily, not as in fall down, but fall for ppl. Its sickening thinking about it, goes to show how fickle i am. Sad to say i was like that for the past 6 yrs, immediately after sec 4, when i went into poly, my mentality changed. Im honest and going to write everything here, i dun care who reads this anymore, i need to be honest and stop kidding myself. And if u happen to be one of the ppl mentioned in the list, im sorry for being so blunt and honest, but still, i need to jote all these down. ( and if i can remember vividly...)

Primary 4 : Meifang , Qiuyen
Primary 5 : Peifen
Primary 6: Peifen
Sec 1 & 2: Huimin, Peifen
Sec 3 & 4: Huimin, Peifen, Meiyun, Danlin
Poly Yr 1: Trillia, Rachel and 5 others
Poly Yr 2: Jiayan, Trillia and 16 others
Poly Yr 3: Corinne. Onli her. Realli.
Ns Yr 1: Corinne. My Everything.
Ns Yr 2: Corinne. Memories.
Starhub: Adeline, Peifen, Gladys, Linda, Yiansin

Im honest, brutally honest. Call me watever u wanna call me, i at least have the courage to show what i am. And when i saw 'her', im stunned. My good frens are telling me to dun tink about the past so much, but these are memories, i cant just delete them.

Regarding myself, im fucked up just like other guys, i go for looks first. All the above listed are pretty and cute in their own ways. I liked every single one of them, but in the end, im still single all the way simply because of my lousy attitude when handling stuffs.

Huimin retained alot of what made her so attractive through the yrs. Her elegance took me aback and i realised i stereotype the ppl i like after her. As long as the person have some semblance to her in any sense, i will like. That's why things turned out the way it is todae. The issue never realli left me, it manifested sub-conciously and wat i did was simply find a trace of her in other ppl. But thing is, i dun take substitutes, i do like people for who they realli are. Huimin is the one gal that i seriously liked all the way for 4 yrs. And peifen is the on-off one,we went out , but when finally she was ready, i was obsessed with corinne. Similarly, same thing happened with jiayan, we actually went out , but then i was occupied with corinne and i did it again.

Anyways huimin is with him for 6 yrs plus le, he is a wushu gold medalist, rich man son, polite and average looking guy, super good boyfrend who brings her around the world. Didnt realised my mistake in the past actually resulted in her finding true happiness. Sometimes fate is funny. realli.

And for trillia, its even better, she became a model and now has a good-looking, rich and good boyfrend.

Same thing goes for peifen, she settled down with a nice guy, although abit plump, yet he loves her alot. And u're right, again i made a mistake that lead to her accepting him and living happily ever after.

I guess the conclusion is, im totally fucked up, and its their luck that they didnt choose me. I might not be able to give them what the other guys are giving them, and i realli woke up to that point. The point that im a total fucker.

Im not self-condemning or low esteem or whatever terms u wanna call me. Maybe i should just shut the fuck up and go stand one side. I dun deserve anybody, and nobody deserves to be attached to such a fucked up person. I know, sounds hush but i realli tink its true, why drag ppl down? They have happiness waiting for them out there, why be an obstacle in their quest for happiness? The 2 gals that condemned me, u people are smart. I totally agree with both of u condemning me. I know.

I need to do my project now, irresponsibility will not be in my list of flaws. And to the one that commented im fucked up. I am fucked up. you're right. im a big fat fucking brainless fucktart that lusts for swan meat. Im just a short and fat piece of shit that exists in this world wasting oxygen and food that could be put to better use feeding pigs. Hope that makes u happi. And before i forget, im childish too. ^_^

Jason's Famous Quotes: Fucked up means fucked up, hiding will onli increase the fucked up index.

EMPTINESS

This few days, i've been loading tis blogger screen and then dun kw wat to blog. its been ongoing for a few days alreadi, and todae, i blogged.

A couple of things happened to me and i was tinking thru them tis few days too. Im not unhappy, im just hmms... concerned u might say. Yesterday was quite uneventful, i simply went back to skool and as usual, i was late for OB lessons..-.-"" Then after that went for lunch with reilly and xuanhe. Rei and i were discussing over lunch tat our OG is splitting le, and we both agree on that. its obvious, everyone is going their own ways after lessons, even sitting also got some distance. I guess things dont last, and each and everyone have their own new frens and stuff ba. I sort of wanna voice tis out to the ppl, i realised most of them kw all tis is happening, yet dun realli see the need to revert back to how we were b4....

Anyways, after lunch is accts, and as usual balwant was a veri engaging lecturer, and puts forth the topic veri clearly. I respect people tat can give good lectures. And during the lesson, my eyes keep looking at someone, i just cannot control them. lolx.. gosh, im not gonna say who im looking at, but rest assured its a gal. Anyways looking is free mah, i kw she's not gonna be mine anyways, unless pigs can fly. hahassss..

After skool, sat down and chatted with nich and elaine and jeanette. Toked about some dumb stuffs and sort of nua around outside the lecture hall. After that i reached home and bathed, then went down to eat dinner with aiying. After sending her home, i gamed till 5am then sleep. that ends my day yesterday. hahass.. boring....

Alrite, now lets carry on to my thoughts. Alina is having a veri difficult rite now and life is realli harsh on her. hmms... but i kw she can tide thru this whole thing de, she's a strong gal mah. cfm can de. hahass... I can sense sadness in people, and that is what troubles me alot... i can sense nich also have something he is hiding, some sad stuffs but i feel he wanna keep it secret.

So, regarding the one tat condemned me, i still tink she is condemning me leh. Dun kw y, i simply feel tat way, maybe she didnt speak much to me? hmms, thing is this, why am i so concerned about whether she condemn me anot? lolx... gosh, sometimes life is intriguing rite? But i kw, if she's reading tis, she will feel im damn er xin and disgusting. hahahass... The thing about me is that im unsettled, its always the case. Well, who will be the one? dun kw, but i kw im super attracted to her, i hope she stops condemning me soon and at least try to be better frens ba.

Nxt week will try to ask strawberry-soursop out for lunch at NUS ba. She told me she's quite free nxt week, so maybe can catch up abit with her and see how's life going. Its alreadi been around 3 mths le, so maybe when we see each other, things will be fresher? And it will be the first time i spoke to her verbally after i gave her 'it'. I guess she forgot all about 'it' le ba, the magic 'it' brought...

My heart has castle, and in the castle lived a few residents, and i dun kw which one is the queen that will rule the castle. Its obvious, and the thing is, there's onli a few residents that realli touched me. Im brutally honest now, onli 4 of them realli made me took a long and understanding look into their eyes. So many unspoken emotions were passed thru the eyes, and yet i was not fated to be the one to take care of them. Well, a tinge of regret is always there, but i kw, the future awaits me. And like what xuanhe told me on the MRT 2 mths ago, 'dun look for it, they will come for u.'....

Jason's Famous Quotes: Todae no quotes, so i give u the 10 commandants of Jasoniology.

1) Thou shall not lust after thou's frend girlfrend. ( But she IS interesting... lolx)
2) Thou shall not use force. ( im a refined man..)
3) Thou shall not badmouth ppl or organisations. ( I failed tis one....)
4) Thou shall not fall in love with ur classmates. ( Its obvious...)
5) Thou shall not oogle at girls. ( Do it discreetly.)
6) Thou shall not eat too much. ( totally crap.)
7) Thou shall not give up on training. ( Shyt..)
8) Thou shall not be too sentimental. ( Seriously..)
9) Thou shall not be hypocritic. ( Finally one tat i passed!)
10) Thou shall not overcommunicate. ( erms...)