不要哭

How strong can u be? Before u say anything, if u say u are strong, then u are mostly not. Why do i say that? Because i know of veri strong people. Emotionally. Respect and admiration is what i have for that person. If its me, i most prob would have gone crazy alreadi. Anyways this information is privy, so i shall not say anything more.

Im veri disappointed with myself, i sucked. Why am i so shy. Wah lan eh, not rite lah, where is the courage? Why can people do something so normally and yet i cant? Lots of why, and the main problem lies with me, im afraid. 我怕她生气 .

SM project deadline is on friday, but im taking it easy. I started todae, and im supposed to be doing it now. Whatever im supposed to do, im definitely not doing it, cause im blogging here rite? yupz, i officially hecked my project for another day. Tomolo will be the last day, i tink i will do it tomolo ba. yeah, tomolo sounds good. =)

Tomolo will be going to the gym if my body recovers in time. Supposed to run todae, but in the end played game with the guys, so running is deferred to tomolo evening. I tink i go gym first, then go swim in the noon. Evening go run ba. I wonder got so much energy anot sia. Ah well, tml do my best ba.

Do my best. The motivational phrase during self-talk sessions before lifting weights till exhaustion. I always ask myself this before the last most xiong rep-- > " Can you go all the way?" . I will answer myself softly --> " I dun know, but i will do my best." And i always managed to endure till the end. I guess its more of small training talk ba, u kw, u needa motivate urself abit verbally. lol

Well, i once said, my problems are all veri insignificant compared to other ppl's. Gals, fats, studies all are juz problems u dig out for urself. Some problems are pushed rite into your face, u have no choice at all. Like providing for your family etc... Im now at the age, where some of my frends are married, or the sole bread winner for the entire family. Some are not educated, so they realli slog it out to support their families.

The above are people i respect fully and totally. Not some rich bastard that drives a sports car and the dad pays for every single fuck thing. They might have the prettiest gal, hottest car and biggest bank account. Hang them out to dry with no fatherly-funding, and u see a helpless weakling whining to god.

Why the sudden tulan-ness? Because todae somebody told me a guy in class said he looked down on people that work and study at the same time. He says wanna study must study full time and whole-heartedly, not work and study at the same time. Wow. So he mean taking his dad's money and leeching off his dad is respectable? I tink this fucktart dun realised tat there are some people out there that cannot afford the fees, therefore have to work and study at the same time to pay for skool fees.

If i heard the guy say this kinda thing infront of me, i cfm fuck his ancestors till they jump out from their graves. Be grateful that u are blessed with a family that can pay for ur fees, dun go around looking down on people that cannot afford the fees and thus need to work. Being educated and smart doesnt make u above everybody, so wat if ur results are good? Weakling. Pui.

Why are there so many fucktarts out there sia, how come some kids never grow up even after army? Im supposed to be meditated and have a heart reminiscent of the open ocean, but i simply cannot stand this kinda of nonsense.

Jason's : Im just a shy little boy lah.